my best friend is gone. he was my first fur-baby that i raised from puppy to elderly. he was with me for more then 12 years. he loved me unconditionally. he loved me in spite of my mistakes. in spite of how stupid i was. he was there during the hardest times when i wanted to die. he was there and gave me a reason not to go out on the ledge. not to keep taking the pills. not to slice down harder with the knife.
watching him die was horrifying. literal heart rending pain. i didn't expect that. it was his time to go. i had prepared for it. i signed the forms. i agreed. then he died and took a part of me with him.
